Today was the Play day.
Cl was not there and As refused to merge my group with Stf' to free me to make last minute arrangements for the play. Ndn was sent to my group but lately I have realized she too is one of those dirty bitches who speak to you as if they were your bestest friend and spit venom no sooner your back is turned so I wasn't exactly comfortable with her...but then of late, I have hardly been comfortable with the others too...so doesn't matter...
In the morning Mtn came to me and asked me casually what arrangements were made for parent's seating. I replied in a subdued voice that I wanted chairs but was refused so maybe he should ask As. He looked at the stage and exclaimed that with beautiful orange chiffon curtains, elevated carpeted stage and even the lights the arrangement really did look pretty promising.
I let out a deep deep sigh. I wished I could tell him how much I had to struggle to do this much.
It was horrible to share my sweet children with Ndn as she was clearly being very hostile to me and she scolded and handled the children harshly the way I or Cl never do. But my mind was too preoccupied to bother about this and I didn't care what she thought or did. Go to hell; all of you. I have been able to do what I wanted and I shall never see and do not want to see any of you after the 23rd of December.
Despite her frowns and scowls and dirty glances at my back, I kept doing what was needed. Soon, it was 1 0'clock and the participants were brought to me for dressing. There were 2-3 people to help me with it but stupid Alc didn't know how to tie their wraps securely so many children's dresses kept coming off and had to fixed 3-4 times. The children looked so pretty and cute with their lovely costumes, jewelery and moustaches which I made with a black marker pen.
The music man had already come and was playing melodious tunes on his accordion in the hall way lending a truly festive spirit. I was vaguely aware of parents coming, oohing and aahing at the dressed up children and taking pictures with their camera.
Then, when we were ready, I led the participants into the hall and at backstage. I was roughly aware of a hall full of people. S had come fully equipped to shoot the event on video camera as well as a camera. Stf, the boss of the school, was also there. Her father was covering the whole play with the intention of posting it on the school's website as a promotional advertisement.
The play started. I believe it must have been a somewhat grand sight with golden light streaming on those tiny lovely little actors handling their pretty colorful costumes and acting in full earnest. Dear children, they all spoke loudly so that their dialogs were audible to the audience and the parents too maintained necessary silence. Dear Lm, he was upset and was crying but still he spoke his lines as well as he was capable of. And I had eyes and ears only for what was happening on stage. I did hear though that parents clapped in appreciation at every scene and expressed their admiration at cute or emotional scenes like Mary and Joseph hugging each other or Mary crying in pain or Mary being frightened on seeing an angel.
The play was barely over and Mk's father leapt, yes, literally leapt on to the stage before anyone could stop him. In the meeting yesterday, I remembered As telling us that Mk's father had expressed his desire to say something after the play but had been refused permission.
He took the stage in his own hands completely authoritatively and gave a short speech thanking us mostly me and Mko for doing this play. Other members of the committee jumped in too and seemed to hold the entire audience in command. On behalf of the parents' committee I was presented a huge flower plant and a big chocolate to Mko as a token of appreciation. He went on to tell us that parents have collected about 200 Euros which is being donated to the school for Summer festival celebrations. A deep painful sigh left my heart...!
Then we presented all the actors one by one. They were all given a small gift from the school and I and Mko both received a big one.
The play was over. The whole school was singing the praises of the play. The parents had arranged for a small buffet for the parents and the school staff. Everybody looked so happy, satisfied, full of enjoyment and merriment. Some children started dancing in front of the music man on his lovely vibrant music. I looked at them with a strange satisfaction in my heart - this is the happiness I had planned, dreamt, worked hard and fought with the school for....!
Then came the shock.
As called me in the office amidst all the revelry going on in the school in full swing. Stf , the owner of the school was sitting over there. Neither of them had any happiness or appreciation on their faces. Without any beating about the bush Stf began,
"I have heard that you are planning to leave but you are not certain when. Since English teachers and that too trained and qualified ones are so difficult to be found and we need a lot of time in finding another one to replace you, I have decided that -" I didn't let her finish. I cut in straight without thinking, without planning, without pausing even for a fraction of a second.
"But I am not leaving."
"But you said so yesterday." As said.
"That was yesterday. In the late evening we received the news that my husband's project has been extended and that means that I am not going. For all I know I might stay here another year or more."
Nothing could have been whiter than this lie and nothing could have been blacker than their faces. They both were suddenly at a loss for words. They fumbled like a blind man on a mountain and were actually looking disappointed.
"So.....so, ...you...you mean to say that you are not leaving?"
"Absolutely."
"And you will give us 2 months notice whenever you leave?"
"But of course."
"OK,..." she looked in confusion towards As who was just as surprised as she was," then, I think...its no problem. You may go now."
"Is that all?" I asked.
"Yes."
It was after I walked out of the office that my emotions sank in. The whole laughing merry crowd suddenly appeared to me like a hazy, far away, unreal dream like stuff. So they were firing me...! My hard work, dedication and sincerity for my job, all the development and happiness which my work has brought about means nothing to them. There is no question of right or wrong - they want me to go because I have been fool enough to disobey what they wanted. They want me to know that they are the boss....How could they be so...
I kept seeing people without actually seeing them and kept talking to them as they talked to me without even hearing my own voice. At any rate, talking and smiling pleasantly was nothing short of torture to me at the moment. I just wanted to be alone. My mind was completely buffeted by a deep turmoil I cannot describe.
I was alone in my room folding away the costumes when Mtn came in. He congratulated me on the success of the play and I accepted.
" You know, I have a suggestion." He carried on. "From next time we should also try to involve all the parents in the play too; for example when the play finishes all the parents can join in Christmas song. That would be very nice. What do you say?"
I laughed bitterly. " The idea is excellent but don't worry. There won't be another Christmas play in this school."
"Why? What do you mean?" He cried.
" I have been banned from doing any such thing in school again."
"What?"
"And the management is very angry with me because of the play and because I talked to you about the mikes. After the play was over I was called in the office. They were trying to sack me."
He stared at me open mouthed in complete horror.
"We must'nt even be seen talking to each other because they will suspect. Please, do not tell about this to anyone."
I immediately came out of the room. I happened to go in again after 10 minutes and was struck to see him standing motionless, gazing out of the window with his back turned towards me, lost in deep thoughts and he appeared so tragic that I cannot describe. After another 15-20 minutes, he was still at the same spot in the same position and yet after another 10-20 minutes he was still there. His child, my actor, had joined in and was happily playing with a toy cart but in deep contrast to this Mtn was still standing quietly gazing out of the window. He appeared to have been almost paralyzed with what I had told him.
The room had gotten dark. Most of the parents and children had left and yet he was still there in that somewhat lonely, dark and quiet room. He seemed to be celebrating the same tragedy of injustice and cruelty which I was celebrating in mine.
I have rarely seen anybody so sad...!
I finally saw him dress his child and go. He was putting on his shoes quietly and he knew I had come in but he chose not speak and I too didn't say anything.
Parents had finished their Buffet and now teachers called me in the kitchen to join them in the buffet. As was also there. I took a piece of lebkuchen and then left. Considering that today and tomorrow were the last day for me in this school, I had plenty of packing to do. I went to the hall and pulled down all the curtains, wires, stage props etc etc. and packed my synthesizer. S started helping me with the packing and I quietly dropped the latest news in his ears. He was surprised too but he is a strong man -he didn't let his face betray anything.
I swiftly told Mko too. "Oh, I am heart broken to hear this. It breaks my heart to know that you, who did so much for the school, is getting such treatment..." He exclaimed and I know he meant it.
The day ended.
S, H and I were going back home with a heart ache. We were mid way, waiting for our train when S suddenly got a phone call from his office. His project has been extended. What a news and at what a time..! This is something for which it has been said " God works in strange ways."
I thank God from the bottom of my heart. Now I know it was His inspiration that made me blurt out a perfect white lie in front of Stf and then He converted it into a perfect truth.
If God is with me, then I don't care who is not...but in future, I should remember not to be foolish.
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