Mz, My Gbt, they all are evil

Wow, what an end to a horrible episode! And what an end to people like My and Mz. I regret they were let off rather leniently just like As. They deserve something more.

I was wrong in my perception of Gbt's character when I said she had nothing to contribute. She has apparently contributed a great deal. She has been instrumental in dethroning the two super power blocks in the school.
At the end of the day I am just impressed by the way these three women have revealed their low character.
Gbt might have ended up doing what the whole school most wished for but that doesn't earn her any appreciation from my side.
 I cannot respect the fact that a person who is barely out of the first six months of his first career in his life, sneaks into deliberate friendship with the two most important authorities in the institution and hatch a murky plot against the very institution, and then has the gut to turn against his allies on a miniscule issue, and go and give them away and now plot against them, as if plotting is his mission in life. This sort of behavior is best explained as having a snake in your sleeve.
I admit I had always found her mysteriously unpleasant, the type of person I couldn't exactly define but felt quite sure I didn't want to trust or be friends with. There was something in her demeanor that struck me as akin to dishonest though I couldn't quite pinpoint it as dishonest. Sometimes you get impressions in your mind you have no words to explain. In short she just bothered me.

As to My and Mz... what else is there to say? Two ambitious, manipulative, deceitful women, armed with the skills of false pretensions, and flattery and no real attributes,  have been able to get along fairly better than the others out there who are people of character, substance, talent and sentiments.
Yet, this is proof enough. Flattery will get you only this far - your meanness, only this down. They are still better off as they already have a new job somewhere else and now they do not even have to serve their notice period and are technically free. In addition, they have the impressive tag of 'served as manager of one of the biggest kindergartens in the city' in their circum viate to benefit them through out their life.

Mz was an evil woman. Her very presence was evil. Her exit makes me feel almost as if the Ravan of Ramayan has been killed.

It is Stf who has emerged as a real hero in this entire episode of plot and deceit. I have a grudging admiration for her keen intelligence which turned the whole plan back upon the perpetrators with no losses in the end. It is remarkable how she has turned a nasty situation to serve her advantage. She is intelligent and worthy of laurels. I only wish she gets someone right to lead her school. Its ridiculous that her efforts to obtain a fitting manager for her school only makes her stumble from one pitfall to the other making lots of money in between.

I wish she wouldn't trust that creepy Gbt. The very thought of Gbt gives me shivers down my spine.

Mark my words. Stf is anything but foolish. Gbt will also receive her end in a similar way...!

Jrn, the Dutch English teacher

Today I had Jrn with me as Stfn is still absent and will now probably come on Monday.

He is from Netherlands and is an English teacher in Mz's group.

He is an easy going guy and seems pretty keen on keeping his job safe uppermost, so much so that he can stoop and lick the ground. Of course everyone has a right on wanting to be safe and I am not at all criticizing him for it but his servile attitude, his unassertiveness, his eyes seem to say I know you are a fool and dog but I don't care. I am happy to call you my king because my job is in your hands. And how true! When everyone in this school has been fired due to just one reason even when they were badly needed for the school this lone fellow has been able to retain his job even though he is now technically not needed.

I love some of his qualities which typically only guys have and girls can never have. He had the guts to come in unwashed jeans and a chequered full sleeved shirt to a formal dinner in a highly posh restaurant where the dress code had been clearly specified and we all team members had been detailed and warned well ahead in advance. He also prides himself on his mobile phone which is old enough to belong to the bronze age and so broken that it has to be sticky taped to stay together. "It does everything I want it to do," He declares with a singular pride; "I can make and receive calls and sms to anyone I choose to, I have no fear of it breaking even if I drop it from a twenty story building, and no fear of it getting stolen ever. What more can a man want?"

A Great Great News!!!

Yesterday we had a meeting about which Mz had already hinted me that it was important. It was!  Unfortunately, I couldn't attend the meeting as I had my doctor's appointment. How I am regretting my absence!

Well, both Mz and My have been fired! Point blank! Their fault? They were seriously plotting against the school!

The meeting was opened by Stf by giving their letter of dismissal. Nobody could believe it. Mz started crying as always. And then the whole truth came to light.

Well the truth is like this: Mz and My both got a bit more friendly with Gbt.( probably because of same religion and same country origin) and all three obtained a better job somewhere else. However they decided to make their exit in a way that damaged Stf the most. So they planned to exit without informing during the Easter vacation. Furthermore they started instigating the other teachers to leave this school too. In fact Gbt left on My's instigation and Mz was telling her newly joined English teacher,Iz that she should leave this school. According to German law, if a school doesn't have required number of trained teachers as against the number of students in it, the school is immediately shut down. If Mz's plan had materialized, there would be only about three or less trained teachers in the school when the school reopened after Easters. It is not easy to find teachers, much less qualified ones. The appointment of at least 3-4 new teachers could take two three months, by which time the legal authorities would shut the school down.

Their plan was fatal and would have succeeded but for Gbt herself!
Gbt was completing her two week notice period and was often absent despite the shortage of teachers in school. My got irritated and told her heatedly that she shouldn't do like this. This angered Gbt so much that she avenged her insult by going straight to Stf and disclosing the entire blue plan with full gory details like the sms, mails etc and swearing that she had even seen their new job contract papers.

Stf, being Stf knew what to do now. Maintaining utmost secrecy,  she offered Gbt more money and cancelled her resignation. Next, she offered more money to Stfn, Mk and Ndn to stay in this school and not to think of resigning from here so that she can maintain the required number of trained teachers in the school at any time. And all this without letting either Mz or My get a whiff that their whole secret was out.

When My and Mz's letter of dismissal was read out in the meeting, it were Mz and My getting the nasty shock which they had snugly been planning to give to Stf. They were given just two weeks notice.

When I went to school today, I learnt the whole truth through Stfn during our circle time.
I had to know what was their version of the story so I asked My and she burst into tears. She took me the kitchen, closed the door then in broken English she mumbled that she worked so hard here and did so much for Stf but Stf believes in Gbt and not her. I gave her a comforting hug and wished her happiness and success in her next job. Then I went to talk to Mz. Understandably, she had more things to complain about.

"I worked so hard. I did so much for this school, for my children, for Stf. And all that has resulted in this? I have contacted all the parents and have talked to committee members and told them the truth so that they know what is happening here. Stf sent me and My dirty sms telling us that we are not religious. We should stop wearing the veil, stop praying to God because we are not fit to do that. we are wicked and God will never forgive us. You know when we were having Cl's farewell, I felt so bad that she was getting so many flowers from Stf and so many presents although she was not even full time. I stayed here longer and did a lot more work than Cl but no flowers for me? I would really like to have maybe just one rose and a note of thank you form her but look, this is how our sweat and blood gets repaid..."
"You told the parents?" I cried.
"of course. They should also know what bad things Stf is doing to us."
"Isn't that something you shouldn't be doing?"
"I don't care."

It was interesting to notice that there was an unmistakable suppressed excitement in the whole school. Everyone was battling hard not to appear happy including myself. Nobody said or even thought of saying that he or she was sorry for them. They just kept their eyelids firmly lowered so as to conceal their elation for the sake courtesy and probably I was the only one to express my regrets and to wish them good luck and then my reason to do so was only to know what they had to say. My good wish for them was not real.


Mks came to me. "Did you hear everything?"
"Yes." I replied. "Tell me are you happy or sad?"
"Happy without a doubt." He grinned shamelessly. "You can't feel sad for mean people like Mz and My! They tears don't mean anything. They were planning to leave, anyways and would have left but their wicked plan backfired at them. They are crying not because they are fired but because they have been found out and now have to leave on Stf's wish, not their own. And so popular are they, and such warmly loved that we are having trouble hiding our ecstasy."

I was in the sleeping room with the kids, waking up and dressing them. I  met Mz. She came to me in tears and hugged me.


"Stf has just now told me and My to leave immediately. She said,"Pick up your bags and go. Right now." I am leaving. I just wanted to say Goodbye to you one last time."

Coming back to my room, I met My, she too in tears. She already had her bag and was going to get her shoes. She threw one glance in my direction and looked away wiping her tears.
"My...?"
"I left."

Soon it was time for me to leave too. I met Ndn at the main door. She smiled charmingly.
"Do you know that both My and Mz have left?"
"That is what happens when you dig other people's grave; you fall in one." I replied.

What's wrong with Mz?

Today as I reached the school I met Mz in the wardrobe area. She was looking unwell. I asked if she was okay and lo! She burst into tears!

"What happened to you?" I cried.
"I am unwell. I had viral fever and am still not okay." She sobbed miserably. "But this doesn't matter to anybody. I must work."
"That's ridiculous. How can you work when you are unwell?"
"I can't take leave. There is so much work to do. I can't let my children be alone with the new teacher."
"But you have fever." I reiterated. "You will only get worse if you work in fever. Why don't you tell My that you can't work today?"
"My...!" She sighed sarcastically. "My is alone too. She has so much of work and her co teachers are also absent. I can't go and tell her,'Hey, I am going home too."
"Maybe you can talk to Stf?"
"Stf..!!! Hmmm. As if she would understand."" She sighed sarcastically yet again." Don't worry. I will be okay. I will stay here till I dry my tears."

I was really feeling bad for her. I went to my class and found we were together three teachers in the group today which is quite a luxury considering we almost always have to manage with so many kids with just the two of us and have to lend Asy to the others owing to teacher shortage. I ran back to Mz and offered her to have Asy in her group so that Mz could go and rest in the staff room. Mz had only Iz, the roughly one month old English teacher.
"Maybe you should ask My if she needs Asy. She is also alone." Her answer struck me as a bit strange.

I went to My and asked if she or Mz needed Asy. She declined too saying she had a trainee and Mcl already and so Mz could have Asy if she wanted too.

I ran to Mz again and conveyed My's message but she assured me she was okay and didn't need Asy.

Later in the afternoon, I was in the kitchen and Mz was there too serving food for her children. Suddenly Stf came in and I couldn't help notice the sudden taut, sarcastic, tense, cold, insulted expression cover Mz's face. They didn't even greet each other and Mz became suddenly very silent looking deep into the dishes she was digging into but appeared to be thinking something unpleasant.

I am guessing she has been reprimanded a bit too severely by Stf so she is angry with her; it maybe regarding her work in office or in school or maybe something entirely different which I do not know. I also feel strongly that she is also angry with My.

We have to have a meeting tomorrow and Mz has told me it is sort of important as Stf is also coming and she has to say something important. A pity I cannot attend this meeting as I have a doctor's appointment.

The illness Fairy

I was absent from the school for one whole week due to being sick.

Today when I returned back to work, I discovered our dear little kindergarten is being visited by some illness fairy! More than half the teachers were absent due to illness. The school had never before witnessed so many children and so few teachers. 'It was the hardest week in the history of this kindergarten!" People told me.
This week again many teachers are still absent.

Gbt, the Turkish teacher in My's group who had been a trainee with us just last year and had joined us as a fully trained German teacher has resigned. This is probably her last week. Nobody is happy or sad...
There are some people whose presence makes no difference to a place's productivity or environment and leaves no dent in your memory or a place in your heart. They have nothing to contribute to. They exist as if they don't exist! Gbt was precisely one such a person. The only two thing which I will probably remember about her was that all the food in the kitchen used to disappear when she was around. And if the food happened to be something nice like the vegetarian pizza then even the children fell short of food that day.And nobody saw her eat that much.

Her second remarkable feature was that she somehow, somehow appeared very slutty..the type who hurl their body and (body parts) right into your eye and seem extremely complacent and dead sure that you are dying a thousand deaths to see what they offer. 

Stfn's Birthday Party in School

Today was a huge birthday party celebration in our kindergarten. We were celebrating four teacher's birthdays together: Ndn, Stfn, Mym and Mks; out of these four, only Ndn was actually having her birthday today. The rest had already had it several days ago.

I had hunted far and wide for Stfn's choice of gifts and finally obtained just what Ndn had told me Stfn would love: home made bath bombs with glitters and the DVD of 'The Fast and The Furious'. In addition I also bought two similar bath bombs with glitters and tiny hearts for Ndn too and a bottle of wine and a small vegetarian recipe book for Mks.

I was very excited!
When I reached the school, I gave the present to both Ndn and Mks in private. Mks was so happy and gave me an affectionate hug!
Then to the real party in the hall!
After the singing of the birthday song for all the four birthday people, it was first Ndn's turn to get the gift. Mch presented her chocolates and a music CD. Then it was Stfn's turn. I brought little Nn and gave her a beautifully wrapped gift to present to Stfn. She opened it up happily and found it was just an empty box! Then I produced the real gift box. First she opened the bag of the bath bombs.
"Oh, I want to go home right now to take bath" She exclaimed. Then she glimpsed another gift box in the bag.
"Another gift?" She frowned. She tore a part of the gift wrapper and on discovering what it was she shrieked with joy and started shrieking and dancing exclaiming "Oh my God! Oh my God! I can't believe this." She ran to me and hugged me tightly.
I was so happy to see her happy. 'Well, you have to thank Ndn for this." I told her. She and I were genuinely pleased.

Mks received a gift coupon of Saturn which is a big electronic goods store and a popcorn glass, while Mym who is a new English teacher in the baby group in place of An received a tin of her favorite biscuits and a chocolate bar.

I sensed a bit of a stunned silence, shock and surprise in everybody's demeanour when Stfn opened her gifts. Everybody seemed to be hurriedly calculating the cost of her gift which appeared to be more than the allotted 20 Euros, whereas the other's gifts seemed to cost less than 20 Euros excepting Mks of course. It is true because Stfn's gift costed me 27 Euros and of course because I make a lot of effort in deciding what the person would love the most spend a lot of time in hunting for the right thing.

I was very very glad that Mz happened to be absent today otherwise she would surely have exploded with jealousy.

Later Stfn told me she was a complete fan of "The Fast and the Furious" and had all the four of its series. The latest one to release was the fifth one. She somehow promised herself that she wanted to receive this DVD as a gift from her family or friends and not to buy it herself. She was so sure she would get it as a Christmas gift but she didn't and she was hugely disappointed. A number of times she had came across this DVD in shops but managed to remind herself of her promise at the last minute and refrained from buying. "And imagine! I get it now from you! I still can't believe this. I can't thank you enough."
"Oh yes, you can. But what I want is something you won't be able to do."
"What's that?"
"I wish I could see you what you look like when you come out of your glitter bath." And we all laughed so hard till our sides started aching.

In the evening they have a big plan! Ndn, Stfn, Mk and Sbr together are going to an old fashioned restaurant.

Update on Cl

A whole month has fled past since Cl's departure. Everything is wonderful here in school and I have enough reasons to believe that in fact my life is nicer than before. I am being treated and regarded as an authority by Stfn, the others in the staff as well as the parents something which Cl had always tried hard keeping that to herself. Stfn always consults me before doing anything and the other staff members do the same which was not the case when Cl was there. 

The first week after she went away, I mailed her and she immediately mailed me back. One weeks later I casually mailed her again but received no reply from her. I thought maybe she was busy in shifting or settling in her new household; maybe she didn't find timeeven to check her mail. However I am constrained to change my opinion now as both Asy and Stfn told me they had both called her and talked to her phone and that she was getting stressed in hunting for a new job. In fact, both Asy and Stfn were thinking I must be knowing more about her latest updates as I was closer to her than the others. It was so humiliating to tell them that I haven't even been replied back.

Another example of Cl's spurious farcical love for me! And still everyday when I check my mail I always hope to find her reply....

The advantage of challenge

Today Stfn asked me if whatever she was doing for the class, as the new teacher, was sufficient or she needed to do something more.
"And more important than that, I need to know if you are happy and comfortable with me. Your happiness and comfort is the only thing that I care about."

I loved her for this. I told her that she was being more than excellent and I could not have wished for more. " And it is surprising that I have been thinking the very same thing too about you, that, you should be happy and comfortable - everything else comes second. By the way, you have been amazing me and everybody else in the school by being incredulously active, energetic, sprightly and almost running around. I am sure nobody could say anything against you now. Not only this, you even look totally immersed in kids and kid's work!"

And I am genuinely happy for her. She visibly works hard for our morning lessons. Today she had purchased fresh fruits, vegetables and bread from the market which she showed to all the children and then we prepared a breakfast with the same. It was a lot of work and I was touched to see that was striving hard to keep up with the new standard that is now required of her. She indeed thinks it's all high and dry toil but what she doesn't know is that it is doing truck loads of good to her body and mind. When you are too comfortable at work it kills your talent, your drive and your challenge. You sort of fall in a  state of torpor which you think is bliss but is actually the opposite. If you want to be a sharp knife, you have to keep cutting....

"All this running around gives me a bit of stress; maybe I should slow down.." She mused.
"Absolutely not." I cried vehemently. "Little stresses are good for us; they distract our minds away from the bigger stresses of life."

Stfn

I learnt a great deal about Stfn the workshop day.

She was great friends with Ad ( the Spanish English teacher who was fired and was replaced by Mks) and in relationship with her brother. Together they planned an exotic trip to the Caribbean during the school's summer vacation. At the time of their return, some misunderstanding ensued between Ad and Stfn. Ad wasn't clear in her instructions to reach the airport. They all three somehow managed to miss their flight by 3-4 hours! Their were no immediate flights available. They had to put up in a costly resort for three extra days. The worst part of the story is, poor Stfn was made to realize that it was her fault they missed their flight so she had to pay for everyone's next flight home as well as the entire expenditure of that extra stay in resort. She not only became bankrupt but hugely indebted too.
A month later she heard Ad's brother got married to someone else without even informing her. Ad herself turned completely against her and demanded an additional 2000/- Euros from Stfn telling she has to pay them as they were incurred because of her.

Poor Stfn! She lost her friend, love, money, bank balance and peace of mind all in one stroke. She is still paying off the loans. Apart from this, she has other problems too. Her sister is in an abusive relationship. Her husband hits her black and blue and has twice broken the bones of his own baby. Currently he is jail for this. Her family problems weigh heavily on her mind and she constantly feels pressured to protect and defend her family like a head. That takes an additional toll on her life and health.
"Since eight years I have not been in any relationship. My health and youth all is deteriorating. I wonder why am I not able to get a man for myself."
Currently she has become friends with another man but he went to Canada and she has no idea if this friendship would ever materialize in a long lasting love for which she is pining.
I proceeded to tell her my own weird story of getting married and she stared at me open mouthed.
"But how can you marry someone you do not even know?"
"Why not?" I retorted. "When you marry someone you do not very well know, everyday of life becomes a day of new discoveries, new passions, new surprises and love starts germinating and growing just as a seedling becomes a plant and then gradually a tree."

I was very very sorry to hear her tragedy. I couldn't get all this out of mind the whole night and kept wondering what can I do to help her.

This Friday, she is celebrating her birthday in school and I, being her team mate, have to buy present for her.
On Ndn's recommendation I have bought luxury bath bombs for her which have glitters in them. Tomorrow maybe, I will get her a cd or something.

Whatever, I always try to motivate her, appreciate her, counsel her and be very loving and caring for her in my own way. maybe because of this or any other reason which I do not know, but there is a lot of difference in her looks, attitude and behavior. She looks a lot happier and active now. She takes a lot of interest in class activities, lesson plans, class decoration etc. She doesn't seem to cower like a mouse in front of any body now but really seem to be immersing herself in her work as I had told her to and it is working.
She admitted this too since a week she has been feeling very nice and happy. Yesterday she was talking to her friend on phone and he remarked that he was hearing her laugh after a long long time. And then she paused and realized that indeed it was true!

Workshop Mess

We had to have two teacher training workshops in school due to which the school was closed down for two days. Parents were grumbling because they had to employ nanny or take leave from work to look after their children.

Well, so today was the workshop. One hour before the workshop was the staff breakfast time. They ate and ate and ate. They really eat a very big breakfast which makes sense as all the food gets quickly digested while working during the day. It was Monday so I was on fast and didn't eat anything.
It being a day without the children all the teachers especially the ladies had come prettily dressed. Stfn and I were also in short tight skirts. My was in a long tight skirt however she forgot she was in a skirt and sat comfortably with her legs wide apart flashing her inner thighs in full public view for nearly 2 hrs or so off and on....

Five minutes to ten, we moved over to Mz's room for the workshop. A lady from some institution was coming to do it. We were sitting in full readiness to start the moment the lady showed in. We even lit the decorative candle on the center table which we had laid out with juice, water and some refreshments.
Little by little the minutes crept by until it was ten, then fifteen then twenty, and then thirty minutes past ten and there was no sign of her.  Mz and My went to ring her and then we discovered the poor thing had been ringing the school mobile since two hrs but her phone was never picked up. Tired she sent an email stating her inability to come today on account of fever.
"So our workshop is cancelled," Announced Mz brazenly, "Instead we are going to have a regular meeting now."
With a groan we settled down to have a regular staff meeting in which the only interesting thing was My's thighs! I guess, Mks and Jrn were having the time of their life! We discussed what to do for Easters as usual amidst chaos and senseless, irrelevant discussion. And then Mz dramatically announced that we were going for a cartoon movie.

We all started out together from the school building. Mz and My were the last ones to come out apparently as they had to check if the doors and windows etc were properly locked. We were all walking together yet somehow within a few minutes all the others all got ahead while My and Mz were behind. I was behind as well because of H who couldn't walk very fast to match the adult pace. And Gbt, out of her own wish chose to walk with Mz and My.
"How disrespectful of them." Mz flashed a disdainful glance at them walking about 4-5 meters ahead of us. She looked like she was boiling inside. "We invited them and they are so insulting that they don't even want to walk together with us."

By the time we reached the station, there was no sign of the others much to Mz's worsening temper.
There were two ways of reaching the theater, one nearer, direct and quicker, the other, a little bit farther and  a few minutes longer. The others had naturally taken the former route and we would have done the same but Mz decided she wanted to take the latter one.
"I am so angry with them. Look at their disrespect! They are so horrible! They didn't even wait for us to catch up. I have a good mind to not to buy their tickets at all and let them struggle to pay for their own movie tickets individually. We are the managers but we get no respect from them at all." Mz ranted.

We reached the theater and glimpsed the others in the hall, laughing and merry with no inkling of the storm of wrath they had inadvertently raked up in Mz and My.
"Oh, there you are!" Someone from the group hailed pleasantly.
"I want to talk to you all first."

Unfortunately, I could never know what she talked to them as H started crying just then and I had to take him out of the ticket counter. I desperately wondered what she said to them or if she threatened to cancel purchasing their tickets as she had been revengefully wanting to do. Apparently, nothing happened and we all watched the movie comfortably enough with Mks laughed his head off at the comic episodes: he was the the loudest one and also the only one to do so at times!

The movie over,we said goodbye to each other and went our own ways: Mk, Ndn and Stfn together, Jrn, Mcl and Mks together for a beer and Mz, My and Gbt for a cup of coffee...!

Tomorrow is a holiday but we have been instructed not to tell this to the parents; the parents only know that the school is closed due to teacher training workshop. If they come to know it is just a holiday without any purpose they would be so angry! I know many of them had to make difficult, complicated or even expensive arrangements to care for their children because of this untimely school shut down.

When we were still in the school, prior to coming to the theater, Stf had come in for a brief time. She told us grievously that she had just suffered a great loss of eleven thousand Euros! She was given a cheque of eleven thousand Euros and it turned out that the bank didn't even exist!
Mz and My told me about this incident.
"11,000 Euros! That's a lot!" I exclaimed in horror. "I am so sorry for Stf."
"I am not sorry for her." Mz replied mercilessly. "It is her fault. Why did she trust a stranger? She should have made inquiries first before accepting a cheque of such a colossus amount. If we ask for a mere hundred Euros, she says she doesn't have money and she can lose 11000/-. She should learn a lesson."

Bad blood between Mks and Stfn

Today I asked Stfn how was her doctor appointment yesterday.

"How surprising! I was sitting in this room for more than one hour and no one, not even one of them asked me about me. You are the only one to do so."
"Well, that doesn't really mean anything. I just want to know what did your doctor say about your ear."
She told me her appointment lasted three hours! the doctor made several tests and found out that she has a nerve in neck or spine which has turned which is causing her all the trouble. She has now been advised to not to lift heavy things, sleep on a special pillow, do some neck exercise and avoid stress.
"Its easier said than done. There is so much of stress in my life. I can't avoid it."
"Yes, you can. I won't let you have any stress here. Be calm and cool and don't worry about anything. How about going out on Saturday evening to a restaurant? We will just relax and chill..."
She was surprised but happy and she accepted my invitation.

I am noticing since yesterday, that she has begun working more vigorously and looks more charged, interested and enthusiastic.

While I was in the sleeping room and Stfn was also there putting Nn and Mnt to sleep, Mks came in. He wanted to talk to me. We went out of the room as he didn't want to talk in front of Stfn. I told him that I had noticed he uses "naughty" word way too much with the kids and it is not allowed as this word is a negative word which makes the children feel aggressive, depressed, insulted and shamed. Further more they pick up this word rather fast and start using it on the other children which is even more hazardous. I also told him that Bhv's mother had mentioned it to me that Bhv often refuses to go to school because he feels afraid of being called naughty by you and many times he inadvertently does  poo or pee in his clothes because he is too scared to tell you for fear of being called naughty. At home he goes into depression telling his mama that "Mks called me a naughty boy!" And the last reason was, nearly all the children in my group have started calling each other "naughty naughty" in just the same way as he does.
"But I have never used this word for any of your kids, only with Ptrk and Schr." He protested.
"Yes, I know, but when you are using this word on Ptrk or Schr the other kids listen and catch on.

He was exasperated.
"What to do when kids do turn naughty! Its not like I am insulting them or angry with them. I just point out to them that what they are doing is unacceptable."
"Yes I know, but using this word can get you in far more serious trouble. If a kid does get naughty, tell him in ugly tones that it is bad and we don't do like this."
"Hmmmm ya, maybe..."
"I have long been wanting to tell you this but I was so scared of offending you. I hope I didn't hurt you, did I?"
The clouds on his countenance cleared and he smiled at me warmly. "No, not at all. I am glad you told me so now I would try to rectify my mistake."

Later, when Stfn had gone, he came in again and started chatting to me like he always does with me.
He told me that when he heard Stfn was replacing Cl he was so afraid for me because he knew Stfn has reputation of being lazy and evading work; he feared that I would have a hard time with her as she would make me do all the hard part and take all the easy part herself. "She is very bad. I don't like her."
"Why do you talk about her like this? I think you don't know her very well. Well, I don't know her very well either but I know enough to refute you that she is not a bad person. On the contrary she is a very nice person."
"I am glad she is nice to you. The truth is she has no sense of how to behave with her colleagues. She is extremely rude and arrogant. I hate the way she talks to me sometimes."
"Maybe it is her just her way of talking and not her intention?"
"What nonsense. She was caught red handed sleeping in the baby room with all the babies up and about. I don't know how you have found her to be amazing. Every morning when she comes she talks as if she condescended to accept your group when the reality is like an open book that she was dying to stay in the baby group. In fact, do you even know what else she did? She was writing mails to parents telling them to write a mail to Stf the boss to send her back to her group otherwise they will withdraw their children from the school. She was talking to parents and instigating them against the school. I was the one who rang Stf to inform her all this as it all happened right under my nose."

I sighed deeply.
"So there is a lot of bad blood between you and her, eh? I only remember a principal: We are here to work and not make friends - or enemies. If she is working fine with me I see no reason why I must condemn her or treat her with distrust or disdain. And I am sure, soon you will also begin to think of her in a better light..I mean I hope so..."

It was time for him to go.
"Hey, its so nice to talk to you. I really miss our conversations which we had when we were together in the gym area with our groups."

Later I glimpsed him and Stfn talking outside the green room. Stfn looked defiant and incensed and Mks appeared to be telling her "not to use  this word as it affects the children negatively and is unacceptable in the kindergarten..."
What the heck?

Tomorrow I and Stfn are going for an evening out in an Indian restaurant. I really want her to get stress free and become happy.

A tete - a - tete with Stfn

Today I was talking to Stfn and I found she is such a fragile, emotional, insecure, frightened person beneath her tough, determined, confident looks.  

She told me she had once suffered from bulimia and her plus size makes her feel afraid of herself. She doesn't like looking into mirrors and have no idea how she must appear in the eyes of the others. She is very often depressed and distressed and suffers from variety of other ailments due to her depression.

I told her she looks extremely smart and confident and despite being a plus size she has a damn good dressing and makeup sense and some times looks absolutely stunning. She was so surprised to hear this.

Why are so surprised?' I asked. "Did no one tell you this before?"

"No. Probably I don't live amongst people who pay compliments."

Whatever My had told to me about Stfn a few days ago was weighing heavily on my heart since many days. I decided I should tell her. She wasn't surprised. She knew it already. 

"But, I wasn't sleeping in my work time. It was my free time. As it is they think I am not active enogh with the children which is wrong because working with babies is different; it doesn't require a great deal of energy or movement."

"I don't care in the least whether you were sleeping in your free time or work time. So do not consider explaining it to me. So far as I am concerned I am glad I have you and not someone else. I know what a good teacher is and I know one when I see one. Earlier, I didn't know anything about your teaching caliber. Ever since you came to my group I noticed how nice you are with the kids, how methodical you are in your approach towards child education, and that despite having worked with babies before you appear to be equally good in handling bigger children. I know you hated and stiffly resisted moving out from the baby group but it is in a way better for you. You are lot more active now and you exercise your capabilities more than when you were in the baby group. Human brain is like a knife; it needs constant work or it will rust and become useless. When I see you working nicely with the bigger kids, I tell myself, this is what you need. You need challenging situations to prove your mettle and to keep your self from rusting away"

"Its not the first time I am working with bigger children. Before coming to this kindergarten I have worked with different age groups."

"Really? I didn't know this before. Definitely your experience shows."

"What does it matter? All the three bosses of this school, Stf, My and Mz do not like me. Especially My and Mz visibly hate me. In the afternoon, when I have to be in My's room together with Gbt, and Mks, I feel so very scared even to open my mouth. I just sit quietly in a corner of the room and mutely do whatever they tell me to. I am just too scared in their presence. I only nice and comfortable with you, Ndn and Mko."

"That's where you are committing a mistake." I pointed out. "They all think you are not active. By being scared and hiding in one corner you are just conforming their suspicion. And why should you be sacred and of whom? Stfn, you are a good teacher and as such instead of hiding yourself in one corner I suggest you do your work with even greater vigor. Do your best and lose yourself in your work. You will feel nicer and the others will shut their mouth."

Today there was meeting the school but I excused myself out of it on account of my Hindu festival and Stfn too didn't attend as she had her doctor appointment. She has pain in her neck and she can't hear from one ear whereas constantly hears a dull bell ring in her other one. 

Without Stfn

I joined the school today only to learn that now Stfn is absent. yesterday she had her birthday and fell ill. She won't be here the whole week now.

So Rfk was sent to help me out; she is a married woman with two kids and a trainee in our school. We were surprised to see that all our kids behaved exceptionally well, including the two new babies Nn and Mtn. And this fact was not hidden even from Rfk.
"Yesterday Stfn and I were with the kids and the whole time it was just plain chaos." Said Rfk. "She was trying to read a story to the child but nobody listened to her. They kept playing and roaming about until she got fed up and shut the book in the middle. She cannot control the children as well as you do. And the biggest thing is both Nn and Mtn actually behave badly when she is present."

This is a fact I had long before foreseen. Stfn is excellent with babies but that also means that she babyishes them way too much than required, I mean the older ones. For instance, both Mnt and Nn have been with her since more than a year but I always saw them as sticking close to her and emotionally completely dependent on her - something which is more akin to over indulging, over attached, over loving parents than a professional teacher in a kindergarten. As a teacher we need to make children independent both emotionally as well as physically and not tied to our apron strings. So both Mtn and Nn are used to being treated like babies and so they continue behaving like one even when they are now old enough. Little Nn constantly sucks her pacifier and keeps carrying her burp cloth 24 hours a day although she is well past both of them. I tried keeping her without her pacifier and her burp cloth and she was just fine! She didn't even once ask for them.

I had more difficulties controlling both of them with Stfn present than now when she was absent.
These two are the children for whom Stfn had refused to leave her baby group; she had been telling since nearly 2 months that both Nn and Mtn were not ready to live without her so they shouldn't be sent to the next group and when she was asked to join my group, she continued saying that Mtn and Nn couldn't live without her so finally Stf the boss decided Stfn must come to my group with both Mtn and Nn! I am sure Stfn will feel terribly bad when she hears that Mtn and Nn both have been such good babies without her. In fact they didn't even once ask for her. Everybody is noticing this and talking about it.

Today Stfn was absent again and Mks was sent to me to help me out. I noticed he was getting a bit stressed probably because he is more used to and definitely more suitable for bigger children rather than little toddlers who take offence easily if you as much as happen to look a bit hard on them or talk to them in a loud volume. He wasn't very great a help to me either as when we were in the toilet he preferred calming down Ls who was crying for his mother rather than help change diapers. It took me soo long to manage all the children alone while he was simply talking to Ls. Later when we returned from the playground, he had planned to go back to his group and send Rfk  to me but My came and told me that Mks must remain with me till the lunch time.
It sounded simple and not in the least offensive so far as I could see, but Mks turned so upset with My for making him stay with my group.
"But what's wrong in this?" I asked. "We can be sent to any group anytime depending on the need of the hour. Rfk cannot come to me today because she has her exam. It won't hurt you to stay in any other group due to shortage of teachers in school, no?"
"Ya, I know, but I wanted to be with my children. I belong to my group."

Both Mtn and Nn are absolutely fine. I took away Nn's burp cloth and pacifier and she didn't seem to miss them at all. However, when Stfn comes back, I fear, they both will revert to their old ways, and since our team is new, I would prefer not to sound didactic to her.