Today I asked Stfn how was her doctor appointment yesterday.
"How surprising! I was sitting in this room for more than one hour and no one, not even one of them asked me about me. You are the only one to do so."
"Well, that doesn't really mean anything. I just want to know what did your doctor say about your ear."
She told me her appointment lasted three hours! the doctor made several tests and found out that she has a nerve in neck or spine which has turned which is causing her all the trouble. She has now been advised to not to lift heavy things, sleep on a special pillow, do some neck exercise and avoid stress.
"Its easier said than done. There is so much of stress in my life. I can't avoid it."
"Yes, you can. I won't let you have any stress here. Be calm and cool and don't worry about anything. How about going out on Saturday evening to a restaurant? We will just relax and chill..."
She was surprised but happy and she accepted my invitation.
I am noticing since yesterday, that she has begun working more vigorously and looks more charged, interested and enthusiastic.
While I was in the sleeping room and Stfn was also there putting Nn and Mnt to sleep, Mks came in. He wanted to talk to me. We went out of the room as he didn't want to talk in front of Stfn. I told him that I had noticed he uses "naughty" word way too much with the kids and it is not allowed as this word is a negative word which makes the children feel aggressive, depressed, insulted and shamed. Further more they pick up this word rather fast and start using it on the other children which is even more hazardous. I also told him that Bhv's mother had mentioned it to me that Bhv often refuses to go to school because he feels afraid of being called naughty by you and many times he inadvertently does poo or pee in his clothes because he is too scared to tell you for fear of being called naughty. At home he goes into depression telling his mama that "Mks called me a naughty boy!" And the last reason was, nearly all the children in my group have started calling each other "naughty naughty" in just the same way as he does.
"But I have never used this word for any of your kids, only with Ptrk and Schr." He protested.
"Yes, I know, but when you are using this word on Ptrk or Schr the other kids listen and catch on.
He was exasperated.
"What to do when kids do turn naughty! Its not like I am insulting them or angry with them. I just point out to them that what they are doing is unacceptable."
"Yes I know, but using this word can get you in far more serious trouble. If a kid does get naughty, tell him in ugly tones that it is bad and we don't do like this."
"Hmmmm ya, maybe..."
"I have long been wanting to tell you this but I was so scared of offending you. I hope I didn't hurt you, did I?"
The clouds on his countenance cleared and he smiled at me warmly. "No, not at all. I am glad you told me so now I would try to rectify my mistake."
Later, when Stfn had gone, he came in again and started chatting to me like he always does with me.
He told me that when he heard Stfn was replacing Cl he was so afraid for me because he knew Stfn has reputation of being lazy and evading work; he feared that I would have a hard time with her as she would make me do all the hard part and take all the easy part herself. "She is very bad. I don't like her."
"Why do you talk about her like this? I think you don't know her very well. Well, I don't know her very well either but I know enough to refute you that she is not a bad person. On the contrary she is a very nice person."
"I am glad she is nice to you. The truth is she has no sense of how to behave with her colleagues. She is extremely rude and arrogant. I hate the way she talks to me sometimes."
"Maybe it is her just her way of talking and not her intention?"
"What nonsense. She was caught red handed sleeping in the baby room with all the babies up and about. I don't know how you have found her to be amazing. Every morning when she comes she talks as if she condescended to accept your group when the reality is like an open book that she was dying to stay in the baby group. In fact, do you even know what else she did? She was writing mails to parents telling them to write a mail to Stf the boss to send her back to her group otherwise they will withdraw their children from the school. She was talking to parents and instigating them against the school. I was the one who rang Stf to inform her all this as it all happened right under my nose."
I sighed deeply.
"So there is a lot of bad blood between you and her, eh? I only remember a principal: We are here to work and not make friends - or enemies. If she is working fine with me I see no reason why I must condemn her or treat her with distrust or disdain. And I am sure, soon you will also begin to think of her in a better light..I mean I hope so..."
It was time for him to go.
"Hey, its so nice to talk to you. I really miss our conversations which we had when we were together in the gym area with our groups."
Later I glimpsed him and Stfn talking outside the green room. Stfn looked defiant and incensed and Mks appeared to be telling her "not to use this word as it affects the children negatively and is unacceptable in the kindergarten..."
What the heck?
Tomorrow I and Stfn are going for an evening out in an Indian restaurant. I really want her to get stress free and become happy.
"How surprising! I was sitting in this room for more than one hour and no one, not even one of them asked me about me. You are the only one to do so."
"Well, that doesn't really mean anything. I just want to know what did your doctor say about your ear."
She told me her appointment lasted three hours! the doctor made several tests and found out that she has a nerve in neck or spine which has turned which is causing her all the trouble. She has now been advised to not to lift heavy things, sleep on a special pillow, do some neck exercise and avoid stress.
"Its easier said than done. There is so much of stress in my life. I can't avoid it."
"Yes, you can. I won't let you have any stress here. Be calm and cool and don't worry about anything. How about going out on Saturday evening to a restaurant? We will just relax and chill..."
She was surprised but happy and she accepted my invitation.
I am noticing since yesterday, that she has begun working more vigorously and looks more charged, interested and enthusiastic.
While I was in the sleeping room and Stfn was also there putting Nn and Mnt to sleep, Mks came in. He wanted to talk to me. We went out of the room as he didn't want to talk in front of Stfn. I told him that I had noticed he uses "naughty" word way too much with the kids and it is not allowed as this word is a negative word which makes the children feel aggressive, depressed, insulted and shamed. Further more they pick up this word rather fast and start using it on the other children which is even more hazardous. I also told him that Bhv's mother had mentioned it to me that Bhv often refuses to go to school because he feels afraid of being called naughty by you and many times he inadvertently does poo or pee in his clothes because he is too scared to tell you for fear of being called naughty. At home he goes into depression telling his mama that "Mks called me a naughty boy!" And the last reason was, nearly all the children in my group have started calling each other "naughty naughty" in just the same way as he does.
"But I have never used this word for any of your kids, only with Ptrk and Schr." He protested.
"Yes, I know, but when you are using this word on Ptrk or Schr the other kids listen and catch on.
He was exasperated.
"What to do when kids do turn naughty! Its not like I am insulting them or angry with them. I just point out to them that what they are doing is unacceptable."
"Yes I know, but using this word can get you in far more serious trouble. If a kid does get naughty, tell him in ugly tones that it is bad and we don't do like this."
"Hmmmm ya, maybe..."
"I have long been wanting to tell you this but I was so scared of offending you. I hope I didn't hurt you, did I?"
The clouds on his countenance cleared and he smiled at me warmly. "No, not at all. I am glad you told me so now I would try to rectify my mistake."
Later, when Stfn had gone, he came in again and started chatting to me like he always does with me.
He told me that when he heard Stfn was replacing Cl he was so afraid for me because he knew Stfn has reputation of being lazy and evading work; he feared that I would have a hard time with her as she would make me do all the hard part and take all the easy part herself. "She is very bad. I don't like her."
"Why do you talk about her like this? I think you don't know her very well. Well, I don't know her very well either but I know enough to refute you that she is not a bad person. On the contrary she is a very nice person."
"I am glad she is nice to you. The truth is she has no sense of how to behave with her colleagues. She is extremely rude and arrogant. I hate the way she talks to me sometimes."
"Maybe it is her just her way of talking and not her intention?"
"What nonsense. She was caught red handed sleeping in the baby room with all the babies up and about. I don't know how you have found her to be amazing. Every morning when she comes she talks as if she condescended to accept your group when the reality is like an open book that she was dying to stay in the baby group. In fact, do you even know what else she did? She was writing mails to parents telling them to write a mail to Stf the boss to send her back to her group otherwise they will withdraw their children from the school. She was talking to parents and instigating them against the school. I was the one who rang Stf to inform her all this as it all happened right under my nose."
I sighed deeply.
"So there is a lot of bad blood between you and her, eh? I only remember a principal: We are here to work and not make friends - or enemies. If she is working fine with me I see no reason why I must condemn her or treat her with distrust or disdain. And I am sure, soon you will also begin to think of her in a better light..I mean I hope so..."
It was time for him to go.
"Hey, its so nice to talk to you. I really miss our conversations which we had when we were together in the gym area with our groups."
Later I glimpsed him and Stfn talking outside the green room. Stfn looked defiant and incensed and Mks appeared to be telling her "not to use this word as it affects the children negatively and is unacceptable in the kindergarten..."
What the heck?
Tomorrow I and Stfn are going for an evening out in an Indian restaurant. I really want her to get stress free and become happy.
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