Chat with Mk

The talk of the school, understandably, was Cl today.

The only one not shocked was Mk.
"Its not shocking to me that she is leaving; what is however shocking is that she doesn't want to." He said wryly.
"You both were so similar," He continued." You both were hard working, loving and gentle towards the kids, striving to make a picture perfect, and happy with the school..."
"Well, as a matter of fact, I count you as similar to myself and Cl as well and the greatest similarity I can quote is that we three actually think about just the children and parents like nobody else does and don't bother a damn about the management, managers or any other politics stuff. We three feel happy with sheer inner happiness which we derive from being with the children and doing our duty with dedication. We are happy people- we were happy people. I am not much sure about this happiness once Cl leaves." I mourned.
"Make a guess who will replace her. Make a really nice guess."
"Ndn?"
"Yes."
"But she is not happy about coming to my group. Does she still feel this way?"
"Yes. She would still prefer to stay with the baby group but...!"

For a change, a teacher is leaving this school due to transfer reasons and not getting fired. For a change, a German teacher is leaving this school and not an English teacher...!

New season to start soon in the kindergarten

I am deeply apprehensive about soon getting a new team mate yet I cannot deny the prospect is somewhat challenging. I had slid into a comfort zone since far too long. Life had become too predictable, too easy, too imaginable. If you keep on doing something for a long time, you begin to degenerate... a sort of stagnancy creeps in. You might call yourself a steady sturdy stone that has gathered enough of moss to last through several life times, or, you might call yourself a stagnant, pool of water that doesn't regenerate itself, doesn't flow anymore, isn't fresh and healthy anymore. Life is change. You stop changing, you stop living. Maybe it is for our good in some other mysterious way..!

The spring time for me, in this kindergarten, is probably over. I am now merely reminding myself that be it warm sunny summer or cold, snowy winter, each is not without some beauty, some utility on this earth.
I shall see what happens and try my best to overcome the new challenge life is throwing towards me.

A sad bad news...! Cl is leaving...!

Today when I met Cl in the morning she said she had a bad news to give me.
"Bad news? What is it?" I asked eagerly.
"Let's finish our morning circle. I can't tell you before this."
"Is everything okay? Are you okay?" My heart had already started racing. "Are you leaving?"
"Wait, please. Let's finish our morning circle first. Then I will tell you." She implored.

We did the whole morning circle and all its rituals with my heart unsteady and mind completely boggled.
When we finally finished it and the toilets as well as handing out the snacks, she told me.
"I am leaving."
"What? Why? When? No..." I cried in disbelief.
"My boyfriend is getting a job somewhere else, far from here and accordingly I must move with him. I am so sorry. When he broke this news to me this weekend, I couldn't believe it either. You don't know, I have spent the whole weekend crying. I don't want to leave. I loved working here. "
I heaved a great sigh.
"You will get a job anywhere. That should not be a problem for you." I smiled sardonically.
"Yes, but I really did like this school. I loved working in an international kindergarten. Its doubtful if I can get such a school there. And even if I get, I won't have you. One of the main reason why I loved working here was you. It was such a pleasure working with you. You have been so good to me, so supportive, loving and caring. I know I might get another school another teaching job but I would never get another colleague like you." She broke into tears and I did too.
"I say the same about you. The reason why I liked working here so much was because you were so nice. I cannot even imagine my life here if Mz, My or Mk  had been with me in your place."
"Same here. I have always considered this possibility; suppose I had Mz with me or my in place of you, I might never have survived even two months leave alone two years."

 We clung to each other and wiped our tears silently. We both were looking forward to difficult tmes looming ahead...difficult changes...unwanted, unwelcome changes...an uncertain, apprehensive foggy future..!

Everything is going to change. Nothing would be same again.
I am asking myself how much it would affect me.
Personally, it is a great loss as I always thought Cl is one of the best persons I have ever known in my life. Professionally it means losing my independence, freedom, initiative and assertion. The group which I feel proud to have formed and developed was possible only because of her unobstrusive character which allowed me to do what I wanted. Any other teacher won't let me have my way, won't let me decide rules, subjects, themes, methods, everything especially if she knew that virtually she was the leader of the group.  My compact comprehensive morning circles will change, our beautiful weekly email to parents will change, language ratio will change and God forbid, I will change if she doesn't speak English...!

I will never have another colleague like Cl!

My dear dear Cl, I really do love you and respect you immensely for your admirable personal qualities. You are one of the best persons I have ever known or am likely to know in future.

Asy praises my group

Since Asy has been in my group she has visibly been happy. And there are enough reasons. However this was just my inner feeling.
Two days My called her to tell her that she needs to go back to Ndn and Stfn's group. She became so distressed. She outrightly told her that if she really must go then of course she would, but if she can choose then she would much rather remain with us.
"But you can't remain in that group as Ndn has to come to them. But if you do not want to go back to the baby group, you can also choose between Mk's group or Mz's group. And why do you want to stay with them?" My suggested.
"I will go to any group if you want me to but my personal preference is to stay with this group because this group is so nice. Working with * and Cl is so such a pleasure. They are so warm, friendly, easy going and take care of me and I feel really nice being with them. There is no stress, tension or hassel with them. Their group is very harmonious and well organized."

She told me she worked with Stfn and Ndn for about a month and didn't like there at all. They were so unfriendly and cold towards her. Stfn just didn't talk to her or greet her outside the classroom. There was absolutely no conversation between them and she felt so uncomfortable and uninvited amongst them.
"Whereas ever since I have to your group my life is completely changed. I feel well cared for, welcome and friendly. I love to talk to you all and don't at all feel stressed. You keep asking me if I would eat something, and send me to have my cigerrette break becasue you know I like it. They never asked me. I was so afraid that I might have to go back to them. Thank God, He saved me."

Another Fiery Meeting

Yesterday I had meeting in my room. As is usual with me and Cl, she always brings her home made cake while I bring Samosa and other Indian snacks especially for the meeting. Apart from that I also use table cloth,candles, tissue paper and other decorative items from my home. The school does pay us twenty Euros for this but till date I have always spent money from my pocket. Its too much of work claiming money back - I would much rather have my peace of mind.

So after the school was over I went to an Indian shop and bought samosas and other Indian snacks and papadums which nobody could pronounce without breaking into a giggly laughter. We laid the table with all the goodies and the scented candles and it looked really beautiful. They all gobbled up the samosa in one wink.

The meeting began just as usual amid idle gossip and chat. Mk since the moment he walked in looked upset and angry. I asked him what was wrong but he didn't tell me. Mz and Mk both were seated at the opposite ends of the table. I glimpsed Mk sneering at everything that was being discussed in the meeting. Finally when it was his turn to say something he said that he has started feeling that he is alone in the team and that nobody helps him even when he is in need.
At this Mz shouted back.
"What's your problem? Since the meeting began you have been making faces at me. I do everything to help everyone and you say nobody helps you! This is enough. I can't tolerate it any more. I am going." She got up pushing her chair with a loud thud, grabbed her bag with a big bang, and thundered out of the room slamming the door loud shut behind her.

We all looked at each other in mute amazement! None of us had expected this.
Just at that time I had to go out of the room too to attend S's call. When the call was over I glimpsed Mz crying in the office. I wanted to know what was on her mind. I went over and found her in tears with Nlgn (our accountant and a close close friend of Stf as well as a relative of our cleaning lady!) cossetting and consoling her patting her head and shoulders as if Mz were a little toddler who just couldn't get over the grief of breaking her toy or something.
I superficially mumbled, "C'mon, don't be so upset. I guess, Mk is in a bad mood today."
"So what? I am also upset. I am tired of him. He is always angry always making faces at me. I do everything to help him and this is what I get in return. I think he is jealous of my job. Let him take my job if he wants to. Maybe he can do it better than me."

It was total drama, like the ones you see enacted on stage or in typical drama films! the way she was shedding tears without emotions and the way she was wiping them and declaring her innocence and his hideousness. She knew Nlgn would report all this directly to Stf.

Back in the meeting room, the meeting resumed. A serious discussion ensued on whether we really are a team and concluded as usual without reaching any conclusion. What's the point of welcoming all the ideas, hearing them and appreciating them when you never want to implement them?

Mk, Ndn and I walked down together to the train station discussing this affair solemnly.

They opined that all our problems, all the problems of the school are just because of Mz faulty, incompetent leadership. Leave leadership, she isn't even a good teacher to begin with. She pockets her salary entirely for free. "The day she was absent and you were sent to her group, we all saw how the same children who are always rowdy and undisciplined and Mz always complains about them, how well they behaved and how happy they were when you took their charge. She just behaves like a spoilt brat and has so much of ego issues. Whoever injures her ego becomes her sworn enemy. She just seems to think that she is the leader and we all are followers. well, if she a leader, then shouldn't she have come back and talked the matter with him to solve whatever the problem was? How can you leave a solemn meeting in the middle of an argument, throw tantrum and go cry rivers in the arms of somebody behaving like a brat or a desperate housewife rather than a responsible manager of a responsible enough institution?"
"I think its time for me to start looking for job in some other school before I get fired from here, courtesy Mz."

Today morning when I went in everybody looked just the usual.
Cl asked Mz if she was ok to which she fiercely replied:
"Yes, I am okay now. I know why Mk is angry with me. He thinks that I am not a good manager and that he could do this job better than me. I want to tell him that I am the leader and not he and so he has to do what I tell him to.  He has to follow me and not I him."

When we started our morning circle time Asy, Cl and I for a long time kept discussing these matters. I learnt with some surprise that Asy and Cl both were actually against Mk because they complained that he is also very stubborn. He gets angry rather too often and then he just makes grim, grumpy, sulky faces without telling anyone what's wrong. This makes functioning with him really tough. If he has any problem or needs something he should say it.

Today being Friday very few children had come, only six to be exact. So I finished off early. The last evening's affairs had been so much on my mind that I was constantly thinking about them until I started getting a headache. I wanted to go home early. I saw Mk and Stfn sitting together on my room's sofa deep in some serious conversation. Stfn glumly said:
"I and Ndn together need to talk to Stf, the boss but we can't leave the babies alone. I asked My to send somebody to our class just for 15 minutes but she said she can't as she doesn't have any teacher free. Can you imagine, she was the one who assured us that we are a tea and we can always look for help when ever we are in need?"
"I am free right now. maybe I can go to your class and look after the children till you do what you want to?"
I offered.
"Really?"
"But yes."
She was so happy. She quickly left me in her room with two babies fast asleep in their cribs and went to talk to Stf with Ndn.

15 minutes later Ndn came back looking disappointed.
"We discussed our matters with her. She is so horrible! She didn't listen to anything. She has finally decided that Asy stays with you in your group as she doesn't want to leave your group. I was supposed to come to your group from next week but now I shall do that two months later because a new full time teacher is coming into our group and I must stay to settle her with the children. I shan't be a full time teacher in your group but will keep rotating from one group to the other wherever I am needed."

Stf was particularly bad to Stfn. "You don't work for me - you work for money. You can leave any day you want to."

Ndn is coming to our group again?

Today the same old story cropped up again:
 Ndn is coming to our group as a full time German teacher and Asy will go back to Baby group. Neither of them want this arrangement. While Ndn is happy working with Stf and the baby group, Asy is more than happy working with us with the bigger children with whom at least something more can be done than just feeding, changing diaper and telling them not to cry. She also clearly coveys withot actually saying it that she doesn't feel warm, welcome and comfortable with Stf and Ndn the way she clearly does with us.

The reason why Stf is keen on forcing Ndn on us is because she is planning to extend or double the school's baby group. Ndn has looked after the baby group for one year, so she is definitely reliable. And our group shall get more children who are under two years old - well, babies, technically; since I and Cl have had children two - three years old and have never looked after babies, sending Ndn to us seems to be a clever solution for Stf.
Both Cl and I were already horrified on discovering this news about getting children in our group under two years. We both want bigger children whom we can teach, not babies. Cl said she would resign if she is given baby group and I have similar ideas....

Showing off project day and Ls's mother...!

Today we had a project day. The children of all the groups were mixed together and formed into small groups and then certain experiments were done in front of the children with water.

I did an experiment with ice explaining how water becomes ice and vice versa. We heated up ice to turn it into water. Another experiment which I did was to demonstrate that heavy things sinks in water and light things float.

I learnt with some amusement that Mz's group did an experiment by coating their finger tip in pepper powder and dipping it in a dish full of soap water which makes a line of pepper powder in water that follows your finger.
Really? It sounded more like a fun activity rather than an experiment to demonstrate a science principle. Couldn't she think of some more meaningful experiment..

When the project was over, both Mz and My dished out a lavish looking hard laminated and colored certificates with the name of the child written on it explaining the experiment in full detail and even had diagrams! These certificates were given only to those children who had been with them in their room. Means the children who were with us or with Mk were not given any which would make the parents think that maybe we didn't do any thing only My and Mz did.

I, Cl and Mk were so angry; we all talked together that it was so so so mean of them! It was Mz and My who discussed in the meeting that we were going to have experiment with water in project day. Nobody breathed a word about giving a certificate also. And why the hell a certificate should be given for a simple class/group activity? Just because Mz and My don't do anything with the children and if they do something once in 365 days they badly need to shout about it from the roof top? Isn't it just plain farce or a bland show off?

Today since we had to mix all the children up, our group had 3-4 children from My's group, Mk's group and Mz's group including 3/4 of our own children. We noticed that our own children and our last years children said Hello, Guten Morgen, Good morning, Fine, Thank you etc nicely whereas the other children whom we hadn't taught, didn't say so. A very peculiar thing is, my group is the only one that says "Fine, Thank you." to the polite question"How are you?" All the other children of the school, including Mz's group which has big children merely say," Fine." or "Good". They haven't been taught to say "Fine, Thank you" which is the standard polite form.

Today Ls mother left Luis with us but remained outside our room for a long time trying to listen if Ls was screaming which she believed he will and he didn't.
I instructed her to come at 1.30 pm to pick him up. I was somewhat sure he wouldn't sleep easily but I had to try. The whole day he was fine; he played and enjoyed and did get nervous whenever I happened to leave him but that was all. He even ate well enough. When I took him for sleeping he started screaming and jumping out of his bed but was soon quiet. He lay down quietly and eventually fell asleep.
The mother had a hard time believing me. She kept on asking me how much did he cry and for how long? How did he fall asleep?, Was he asking for her? What were his activities?, How long did he sleep?She asked me the same questions again and again and with such a wondrous expressions in her eyes that I was ready to faint now. My tongue started reeling because I was tired of telling her the same things again and again and again.
"Don't you believe me?"
"Yes. It is hard for me to believe because at home putting him to sleep is a herculean task. He has never slept without me beside him and only I can make him go to sleep with such an effort everyday. It is almost impossible for me to believe that he went to sleep without any trouble and slept for so long."

When she finally left Ls gave me plenty of smiles, a couple of flying kisses and even a hug. He went away smiling as sweetly as an angel. One hour of sleep had fully refreshed him...and made his mother go out of her mind. She was still incredulous that whatever I had told her was indeed true.

"If I become a mother like her and behave like she behaves," Said Asy, "then you should give me one tight slap across my cheeks - no words - just one slap!"