Sv has gone from the school but I continue to think about him the whole day and nights, during eating, travelling or going to sleep. The same with Cl ! We keep wondering how his parents could have behaved with us the way they did and accuse us of so many wrong things. I look around in my group and find that every child loves me and Cl and love coming to school everyday. All the parents are full of praise and admiration for us and keep telling me how their children love and adore us and are learning so much.
His case was so unfortunate and so tangled. I feel sad for him and am angry with his parents that they are harming their own child and think we are at fault.
I can't help feeling glad that he is no longer in our kindergarten as his troubled behavior was having a pronounced adverse effect on our group. He used to hit and behave badly with all the children whether big or small which used to anger them and make them dislike him; consequently they all had started imitating his behavior and had begun hitting, disobeying and pushing each other. His behavior had made him unpopular with the rest of the children and nobody wanted to play with him or be his friends or partner while walking in a line. We tried so hard to integrate him with the group but neither Sv helped nor his parents and we were left helpless.
In my past career I have experienced several cases when kids didn't like coming to school but I had been able to solve the problem every time by making them feel extra loved, cared and friendly. I failed this time because
of his parents who held their own opinions and interfered with our functioning resorting even to blatant lies, arguments and fights to prove themselves right and us wrong. I wish they had listened to us and wanted to know what was his problem and ours and how we could work together to find a successful solution. The simple meeting which we had convened to discuss those issues, was regarded as a 'complaining of the child' session. What need had they to tell lies to us and blame us for things we hadn't even done? How could they think that would have helped Sv? If a doctor wants to treat you and you resist thinking he is an enemy who is going to harm you then how do you think you can get well?
I remember Stf had straight away suggested to me that she wanted to expel Sv; it was me who had protested that we being a kindergarten can't morally expel a child just for being naughty and behavioral problems or having problematic parents. I had suggested that we call the parents and have a detailed talk with them and seek their help and cooperation in solving this issue even though I knew that they were least likely to listen to us but I still wanted to give them and Sv a chance.
I know it deep down in my heart that Sv will have the same problem in whichever school he goes...!
His case was so unfortunate and so tangled. I feel sad for him and am angry with his parents that they are harming their own child and think we are at fault.
I can't help feeling glad that he is no longer in our kindergarten as his troubled behavior was having a pronounced adverse effect on our group. He used to hit and behave badly with all the children whether big or small which used to anger them and make them dislike him; consequently they all had started imitating his behavior and had begun hitting, disobeying and pushing each other. His behavior had made him unpopular with the rest of the children and nobody wanted to play with him or be his friends or partner while walking in a line. We tried so hard to integrate him with the group but neither Sv helped nor his parents and we were left helpless.
In my past career I have experienced several cases when kids didn't like coming to school but I had been able to solve the problem every time by making them feel extra loved, cared and friendly. I failed this time because
of his parents who held their own opinions and interfered with our functioning resorting even to blatant lies, arguments and fights to prove themselves right and us wrong. I wish they had listened to us and wanted to know what was his problem and ours and how we could work together to find a successful solution. The simple meeting which we had convened to discuss those issues, was regarded as a 'complaining of the child' session. What need had they to tell lies to us and blame us for things we hadn't even done? How could they think that would have helped Sv? If a doctor wants to treat you and you resist thinking he is an enemy who is going to harm you then how do you think you can get well?
I remember Stf had straight away suggested to me that she wanted to expel Sv; it was me who had protested that we being a kindergarten can't morally expel a child just for being naughty and behavioral problems or having problematic parents. I had suggested that we call the parents and have a detailed talk with them and seek their help and cooperation in solving this issue even though I knew that they were least likely to listen to us but I still wanted to give them and Sv a chance.
I know it deep down in my heart that Sv will have the same problem in whichever school he goes...!